Prepared For Life

My education with the Montessori method has taught me that an independent child is a happy child, a functional child, a child with inner discipline, and a child that is following the course of his/her nature. When directing a class of 3 to 6 year olds the concept of independence is easy to follow and let flow because of how the classroom is prepared and the knowledge and tools I carry as a teacher. Helping the children help themselves is my duty as a directress. For the child indepence begins when they leave the car and walk into the room, greet me and other children, take off their coats and shoes, hang up their coats and put on their slippers, and begin to look for work. For new children to the class, this tends to be a challenge in the beginning. They are so use to having someone else with them doing for them. As the school year progresses so does the young childs ability to do for themselves and think for themselves. I have had many parents tell me that when they are driving to school their children are telling them what work they are going to start with that day. This is independent thinking at one of it’s finest. The children are thinking about the activities he/she wants to start their day doing and nobody is going to tell them otherwise. This independence builds so many positive attributes in a person; self confidence, inner discipline, intelligence, positive social development, concentration and consciousness of their own work and achievements. As a directress of a classrooom it is my responsibility to prepare the right environment for this wonderful natural phenomena to take place.

As a new mother my role is the same. However, it is not as easy for as a mother I have other duties; i.e. laundry, meals, cleaning, shopping, and all the other mother and housewife duties. But I have taken on this role with love and confidence that I can aid in my child’s development the same way I have aided in other children’s development. It takes more time and patience but it works. My son is now 16 months and very strong willed. To some this strong will is an obsticle and a battle. Of course we (my husband & I) have times of frustration but with patience and a calm voice we set the limits and boundaries that our son is seeking without diminishing his spirit. The strong willed child has traits many of us admire as adults. With proper molding this will can be preserved and put to good use. With time I’ll give you some of the techniques I use and the outcomes I’ve seen and those we are still working on.

According to Dr. Maria Montessori’s teachings, walking and language are the first and most monumental steps towards independence. These are two of the many forms of childhood independence I will focus on today. Our son was born on Memorial day and let me tell you it was a memorial experience. When we brought him home we were showered with gifts and advice from every mother and grandmother. Among the many appreciated gifts were many unappreciated pacifers. Many people told me, “OH you’ll need these to stop your child from crying.” or “Infants need to constantly suck, this is what he needs.” or “Well won’t you rather have some time of peace.” or (love this one) “It’s better he sucks a pacifer than his thumb.” Now I can be very sacastic and critical about these comments, but that is not my purpose. The pacifer is a unnecessary accesory for children for many many reasons. However I am sticking to the point of language and how our son has built his repitoire of sounds and words to gain the independence of communication. I kept the pacifers around knowing in the back of my head my decision not to introduce them was the right thing but every mother wonders, “Am I doing the right thing?” Our little newborn was strong willed from the beginning. He cried and cooed and knew what he wanted. Trying to figure this out and be sleep deprived was not easy but we managed. Because we didn’t give him a pacifer he was able to vocalize his needs early and with keen observation we could understand the different cries and wimpers. He began making sounds with his tongue (that wasn’t being used to constantly suck some other foriegn object besides my breast) and moving his lips to imitate his father and I’s movements. We also taught him sign language and continue to use it as a form of communication (but that’s another day). Another monumental event was his first smile without an object obstructing the view for us to see. My point to all this is pacifers, (in my opinion as well as others), delay language. And as I pointed out earlier, language according to Dr. Montessori (The Absorbent Mind) is one of the first steps and natural process along the path of independence.